We’re surrounded by people in who are appear to be free in their relationship. But not everyone has chosen to be partnered up. Many don’t feel free in the relationship they’ve chosen.

Many of us fantasize that life will be better once we’re in a relationship. But all around the world there are couples who remain unhappy.

Where’s the gap? Are so many marrying the wrong one?

Many who haven’t yet chosen a partner claim they aren’t ready or haven’t met the right one. Few will admit they don’t want a relationship altogether.

What makes the difference between those who feel free in a relationship and those who don’t?

Lots of people who are partnered up are ill equipped, or not emotionally ready or prepared for what’s involved. After the sparks and fireworks wear off, they’re left feeling deflated and mistakenly believe they married the wrong one.

Few will look inside and ask what they could have done differently to make the relationship work. Less will admit they really don’t want commitment, and never did.

The reason is because it feels wrong to say I don’t want a relationship, or I don’t have all the answers. Many are too scared to say, for now marriage really doesn’t suit me for one reason or another.

Not everyone is in a position to give up their hectic lifestyle to be in a relationship.

Relationships require time and space. If you don’t have this, it’s probably a good idea not to get into a relationship, because you’ll probably just tick off your partner.

And even worse, feel super annoyed with yourself and like a slave to your relationship.

To be in a relationship or not, either one requires a conscious choice.

You can feel free in a relationship, or out. What brings a sense of freedom and peace of mind is the conscious choice involved.

If you’ve chosen to be in a relationship, but just haven’t found the one, or the timing isn’t right yet, feel the freedom that you are on a path towards finding what you want.

The journey to finding a partner is longer for some than others. The decision about whether to be in a relationship is your cup of tea is a shorter but even more essential road.

Too many of my clients suffer because they never took the time to reflect on whether being in a relationship is for them. They get into a relationship or remain alone through inertia, and not conscious thought.

This is a pity and needn’t be the case.

From my experience, WHO becomes less of an issue once you’ve chosen the WHY. When you’re clear about why you want in or out of a relationship, the rest falls into place.

If you remain in a place of ambivalence and fear, this is unnecessary torture.

If on the other hand you have chosen to be single, than own it, and be proud of it. There is nothing wrong with this decision, and don’t let society make you think otherwise.

If you aren’t sure where YOU stand, hit reply. I love helping people with difficult decisions like this