Do you ever notice that your family dynamic is a little more insane over the holidays than at any other time of the year? Sure one tends to see their family members more during holidays than at any other time, but why do so many family fights happen then?
Many people feel like cringing when they link of holidays because they associate them with feelings of stress and anxiety. Who job is it to help with cooking and cleaning? Whose turn it is to take out the garbage. The house is more chaotic than usual…In a family’s attempt to create a beautiful atmosphere for the holidays, often times the organizers get caught up in planning to perfection. This comes at the expense of other things, like enjoying the time and the people around them.
Another reason that family feuds tend to emerge more around the holidays is because family gatherings evoke recollections from the past. Old sibling rivalries that haven’t been quashed, or when wounds from the past emerge tension and friction fill the air. A slight comment gone askew can cause skin to crawl or tensions to flare.
The best way to continue to gather together for family holidays without the tension is to lower your expectations. Instead be ok with a bit of mess. If the food doesn’t turn out perfectly, the kids clothing gets stained or guests turn up a bit late…just breath and let it go…Let your family members create the experience together. Rather than force your traditions and beliefs encourage and inspire… Create a safe space for yourself by telling family members that certain topics are “no go zones” before meeting up. If your family members cross the lines you create, then it is up to you to remind them that they are out of line, firmly and without anger.
I hope all of your holidays go well..Drop me a line…let me know what tip you found helped your holiday be more enjoyable for you…[email protected]